The most fulfilling thing to me.

It is seeing people grow in God, yes even myself. Yesterday was a God awesome Sunday( of course any day is God awesome when one is saved and walking with God). We had 4 people five mini testimonies. As they walked up on stage, I knew them all and had heard some of each ones story, before this day. But I sat wondering what God would bring forth this day. The first God showed me that we can all still hurt from some of our past. The second, truly opened my eyes to where his walk is with God.  it also made me think. This person and I when we have conversation, almost always make me stop and think. I like that he makes me think. because that not only grows more strength back to my mind. It also helps me to know where I firmly stand in my htowth in God. Anyway at times I have wondered if this would be the time he would walk away from me, cause I said too much.....yet he never has. And yesterday God reminded me of something. I once was on the other side of conversations like this and I said to my friend, perhaps I say too much. She said, no, I ask tough question that make her think. we had written that in a note to each other and I kept that note for many months, as I was unsure in that moment if that was a good thing or not. Anyway, for me, that this man now has conversation with me that really makes me think, is God awesome in many ways :-).
The third was a women that.....well put simple we have had our differences but God always keeps me intreeged about her. She just gave a testimony on her past few yrs. This woman I think God keeps me connected to because we are so different, yet so the same. Biggest is how we connect with others and how we present ourselves to each other. God is teaching me through her that a strong leader in God can accept people right where they are, even if where they are is against a grain that is fimilar to self. And with all that I am still excited for every step I see her grow in God :-)
The last person that gave testimony, was most interesting too me. he recently revealed the area in which he thinks God is conecting him with others the strongest. Yet in this mini testimony he only spoke of his personal walk. For a moment that confused me a bit. Then God showed me. He spoke of the part that God wanted him too, cause someone needed to here that. I heard his testimony before on how he was drawn to church and I got to say, it is so unique that it never grows old. perhaps  newcomers needed to hear it as well. To this one God once again showed me that is always is simple what God wants it be.

One to a bit more personal. My oldest son, God has been working through him to reach his housemates.friends. recently the couple that lives there had talked about coming to church. he more shy anout it then her, but at last the timing is not right for them. She just found out that she is pregnant again(they have a 10 month old baby girl) and having complications. So now God is going in a differnt direction. The other adult that lives in that home is a 30 yr old black man. My son told me last Sunday that now he wants to come to church with us. I personally am thrilled about that. I of course though am thrilled when God reachs anyone. But Satan is always waiting to pounce. The church I go to is prodomently white, in a town that is prodomently white. When Satan showed me that, I turned and said "Really God?" Part of my walk over the past 10yrs or so has been that God brings me to a fairly new church and connects me first with the leaders, and has me brong to the church what has never been there before. For many years that was my middle son. simply because he is ADHD/ODD and high maintance. when I first came to this state, this son of mine is the one God used for me to see the heart of a church, as I was search for a church to call home. You see for me it is simple. If a church can accept my speacil needs son, then the heart of that church is God and if they can't then the heart of that church is people. well my current home church accepted my middle son and God has grown many of us through him. As things shifted in life, as they always will, then God took the the next step and this time it was my oldest son that brought something to the church that had never been there before. Now on this one I had to step back adventually. God need me out of the way. And it broke my heart when my oldest son decided to walk away from the church. adventually though one of my daily prayers became that God mend the hearts on both sides that one day my oldest son would be able to return to the church. It has been so God awesome watching God do this with all involved.
Now it looks like God will be bringing a black man for the first time to this church. A bit of me wonders how they will re-act.  a bit of me wonders as to how involed God will have me involed in this if this is indeed an area that my church needs to grow in. Then I turn to my son and say yes this man can come to church with us next Sunday and as long as thier focus is on God they will accept him just as the would any other. I just sometimes wonder why God keeps returning me to these cutting edges.

alittle more personal. My youngest is 8. She is saved and has talked with me about getting baptized. When we first started talking about it(many months ago) she was unsure about getting baptized. I simply told her that is was nothing to worry about, because Jesus knows everything and when the time is right for her to be baptized, Jesus will make it comfortanle for her. Recently, she has told me that she is ready to be baptized, and that we need to talk with Pastor about it. Ironically, she even got alittle testy with me when I kept forgetting that we need to talk with Pastor. Anyway this past Sunday we did talk with Pastor is she is now signed up to get baptized.

Now what is interesting here is conversation between Pastor and I. See my youngest is shy to talk with men, unless she knows them well( I think that has alot to do with that her dad has not been a part of her daily life since she was 1 1/2) so most the talking was me and pastor. He questioned if my girl was trully saved. I said yes she is. as to many have talked with her about Jesus, on Sundays, Wednesdays and Fridays. An then he mentioned about her age. I know she is young, me and this child has talked at length many times about what being saved is. After I left that conversation, defence was tickling my thoughts and temptation of writing a defense e-mail to my pastor crossed my mind more then once. But I took a step back and ask God, should I? and then God showed me, my flaw. I struggle with when a mans question me about what I know as truth. It almost imediateld throws me into this mode that I feel I have to prove myself over and over again.  This time God stopped me from that. God knows and if it is God willl that it is time for Mollie to get baptized, she will,  nothing will be able to stop God :-).still a part of me truly wishes others could have witness the weekly coversations(on Wed and Friday evenings when we are doing all that driving) that have been so richly filled with God and my youngest child's knowledge of him and growing to be saved :-)